Hello Stranger

There I was, at dinner when I got a wag of the finger: you haven't blogged since April! She was right. They all were right. I can't dispute facts.

So, what has been going on these last few months? A Shit Load.

Life is divided into categories: work, family, and friends, with love binding them together.

Work: Yeah, that whole go work in The White House for a year didn't exactly go my way. Not that I was surprised, but very disappointed. That news came in early May, the time frame I refer to as the mid-point of the vortex of crap. 2010 wasn't off to a good start anyhow: the tornado, a break-in, a rat, deaths. Clearly the holiday update letter would be a downer.

Mom came home in May and through lots of talking and crying, my job and I parted ways around Memorial Day. Since then, I've done a lot of drinking, sitting on my ass, and wondering what the future will hold.

Turns out, I get to create it all myself. Create I have! Please get acquainted with Sassy Pants Public Relations, a joint venture by Allison Gregg and Shannon Siegel. We are your public relations and community outreach team.

We have three clients and a big proposal due this week. It is amazing work: ever-changing and no coolers or snack baskets to lug around. On the radio the other day a Bud Light Salute commercial played. They were saluting the Rolling Cooler Cooler Roller. I laughed so hard when at the end, the singer said something about "the reason you're the Rolling Cooler Cooler Roller is that you have no friends..." I have rolled my share of rolling coolers. Immediately thanks went out to Scott Smith for being my Rolling Cooler Cooler Rolling support system.

What category is next? Family. Family has three circles: At the center is Jake Ryan, Poncho, and me; the next circle is mom, brothers, their wife/gf, and nephew Ethan; the larger circle is made up of Aunts, Uncle, Cousins. I really do love my family and they sure have been supportive these last few months.

But at age 36, I want more. As such, I am starting a "Who Wants to be My Baby Daddy?" contest. Yes, the maternal and wife gene has finally started to work. Right now I have one contestant in the Baby Daddy section of the competition, but no Husband Contestant. BD Contestants will have to answer an extensive questionnaire that will cover issues like:
1. How often do you ride a bike?
2. Boxers or Briefs?
3. What kind of baby experience do you have?
4. Do you plan to move out of the area?

As for the HC, the questions will be a little more extensive and range from music preferences to adoration for me. I just know we'll find a winner eventually.

Last - friends...who would we be without them? Who else would lay on the floor and eat crackers with you? Who else would refill your sand holes? Who else would send you love when you need it the most? Or pick on your crazy flaws with humor and honesty? Our friends are an amazing thing. Whether they're wagging their finger at me or designing AG logo accessories, friends rock. But wait, there's more!!!!

I am eternally grateful for my friends that have had babies. I love me some babies. I've spent a lot of time snuggling and burping little Charles Ayres. His momma and I delve into life's greatest issues while the little guy gets used to this world. When looking into his face, it becomes apparent that the greatest gift God gives us is love.

Love comes in so many forms: work, family, dogs, and friends. But the greatest love resides in the heart of child who, at three weeks into his amazing journey, rests peacefully in my arms.

Now, I just gotta go get me one!


  1. I fussed at you too for your lack of bloggy-ness. Can I help with the BD and HC? We need application forms and a pageant of sorts...

  2. Amy - we are building a questionnare ... need to have at least three candidates - they have to be UNMARRIED, preferably already have kids (so I know they can fulfill the mission), and ... well, that's really about it. Let me know if you have any contenders in mind. :)


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