Tales from The Front

Morning Surprise
The yard guy showed up about an hour ago ... and when I hear the telltale signs of his arrival, I rush out back to pick up the dogs' toys. Besides writing the check to pay for his services, I feel like this is the least I can do. When I went out back this morning, the dogs had taken a NEW box of 40 tampons outside and had used several as chew toys. Even though I knew no one could see this, I just laughed and hurriedly picked them up. I don't understand why they don't chew on the countless toys I've bought them.

Stop Watching That Crap
Last night I was busy working as the television was broadcasting a marathon of Dateline Investigation stories. Tales of wives done away with because of jealousy, lives torn apart by senseless murders, all shown with a menagerie of wedding pictures, couples smiling as a soundtrack doom plays in the background. Each episode ended with a jury's verdict and a family, that once seemed picture perfect, ruined. After several hours of hearing these stories, I started to wonder if my Baby Daddy mission was the best way to go.

I came to the conclusion that yes, it is. While not every marriage ends with murder, these days more end in divorce. While my method and approach is controversial, it's what's best for me. I'm not good in relationships. I've tried, really tried. I'm too scared, too hard to get to know, and way to set in my ways to try something new. Now that I'm older, I want different things than I did 10 years ago. Today I want a baby and a baby daddy to join me in the journey. I don't want to worry about him cheating or leaving. I certainly don't want him to have to run out back to pick up a box of 40 tampons that the dogs have torn apart.

But I wouldn't mind someone to come pick me up at the airport.

The Boys of Summer
With my new schedule, I often find myself at The Matrix during the 9 a.m. hour. This is my time to catch the most wonderful sight! Like clockwork, a few of the players from the Huntsville Stars come in for their workout. I need to take a moment just thinking about it.

On Thursday, about five of them occupied my line of sight. I trotted on the treadmill, listening to Big and Rich encouraging me to save a horse, as I stared at this group of guys, I am impressed with everything about their exteriors. They are simply beautiful, young, and breath-taking. Their moves put Tony from P90X to shame.

It's at this point in the story where Allison The Writer wants to tell you a life story - create some sort of lesson gained from watching these guys. There is no lesson. The view is beautiful. I am well aware of dating leagues and know we aren't in the same, but that doesn't stop me from coming back to gawk. Maybe next week I'll consider bringing a baby daddy questionnaire. Or maybe not - I'll just enjoy the view until baseball season is through.

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