Showing posts from 2011

After Glowing ... Still

I checked the race results online today to assure myself of a few things:
1.  I really did win my age group
2.  I wasn't the only one in my age group

Yes, there were fifteen women in my group.  The second and third place finishers came in within two minutes (after me).  When the awards ceremony was held, I was the only female who came up to the stage.  See:

Yes, that's Olympian Johnny Gray in the hat.  Note the difference in my body and the male top finisher.  He's fit and fast.  Seeing this picture has inspired me to get my ass back to running daily.   I do want you to know that I did not run in that skirt.  I changed after the race because ... well, let's get personal here ... running makes you sweat.  I hate the smell of any bodily secretion.  Knowing that I'd have to stay after the race, I grabbed this skirt and granny panties on the way out of the house.  It was windy.  I am sure my hanes her ways were seen by those downwind of me.  Hate it for ya, especially sinc…

Let's Get Serious Here

It's Sunday.  It's rainy.  If rainy days and Sundays get you down, you're royally screwed today.  Judging by the chatter on Facebook, it's a rainy day across the state.  At my beach place, the dogs are napping and I'm eaten up with cabin fever.  I just finished Mindy Kaling's book and have been approached by a publisher (or someone who claims to have connections).  Perhaps it's time for me to get serious.

Should I really be writing all this in a blog and then turn the blog into a book?  Why pay for what you can get for free?  But then again, this cow loves giving away her milk.  I can't quit it.  Writing is who I am.  It defines me.  I am such a writer that I love loathing it. 

I need to find the bridge that's going to take me from the infrequent blogger to paid, published, internationally-hailed writer.  The problem has nothing to do with finding the bridge, it has to do with me believing I can actually cross it.  I can.  I think.  I mean, if I ha…

Don't be a Goon

A little more than four years ago, I wrote this column. Please take five minutes to give it a read. The depth of this blog will be missed on you if you don't. I promise it's quick and easy. I'll be waiting for you.
Now that you're back, we can continue.
The words of Deena's coach said have stuck with me. I don't have a strong belief system in much, but those words are my mantra. Ever since moving to a new city, running has saved my sanity.
Before we go any further, there's a few things you need to know:
1. The company for whom I work sponsors the US Olympic Track and Field Team. As part of our sponsorship, we have the opportunity to bring Olympians to the area for events. 2. I love the Olympics. 3. I luuuuuvvvvvvvvv the summer Olympics. 4. I wrote a column about Deena Kastor about four years ago (in which I misspelled her name). 5. I have no filter and very little tact.
Again, back to our story. Picture it: Gulf Shores, BP offices, a qui…

So Much Has Happened

In six days, I'll mark three months of my new life. Beach life has been an adventure. Dancing through my head are countless stories I've been meaning to tell you.

I don't have the attention to write it all out right now - and I doubt you have the attention to read it. So I'll share with you a story of love, a story of pride, and mix in a little humor while I'm at it.

The first thing you need to know about Beach Life is that they actually call it Salt Life - in homage to living life by the salty sea. (Cue the Zac Brown Band's Knee Deep). Our sea is the Gulf of Mexico and it's the most beautiful beach I've seen. I work there, play there, read there and dream there. Its shores are sugar white. The water is crystal clear. The second thing you need to know is that nothing starts on time. When they say 3:30 p.m., they really mean 4ish. To me, 3:30 p.m. means 3:15 p.m. I've sweated out a lot of waiting time. Because the third thing you need to know about the…

Heat and Road Kill

Just a Few Thoughts

It is 6:18 p.m. on the first day of summer, which happens to be my mom’s birthday. Happy Birthday Cindy-Lou! It’s also 86 degrees outside. Tonight around midnight, I am going to wake up and stand on my back porch just to remember what the 70s feels like. Yes, it’s going to dip down to 79 degrees. I am slightly giddy. However, I’m pretty sure I’ll sleep through the cold snap and by the time I get on the road to run in the morning (circa 5:30 a.m.), the temps will be back in the mid to low 80s.

I am not complaining at all. I’m merely stating facts. And the bottom line is that it’s hot. It’s so fucking hot. This morning it was so hot that Poncho puked three times before collapsing into the wet grass. I carried his panting ass back to the apartment and put him in a cool bath. He’s fine. Mind you he ran like the dickens during his off-leash session. Bless him.

I know that the heat is getting to me because I get warm and slightly uncomfortable when I see the national newsca…


It's been three weeks today since I packed up my life, cried my way across the state and arrived in Gulf Shores. I was a hot mess. It was the Friday of Memorial Day and traffic was a bitch. The movers were sweet, young boys who sprinted up and down the one flight of stairs with half of my life's possessions. They put things where they needed to be and left me alone. The dogs inspected the new place, but could not be settled.

Without the basic needs for a new house, I hurried to Target. Surely my happy place would lighten the mood. No. I loaded the cart with new dog beds, toilet paper, wine, a corkscrew, snacks, and water. I lugged it all up the stairs, quickly realizing how one flight of stairs would either change my shopping addiction OR trim my tush. The dogs were relieved upon my return. I put things where they should go and attempted to calm the boys. Again, they were none too pleased with my life decision.

I slumped down on the screen-in porch and cried as the evening'…

Wack-a-doo Wednesday

It's 3:15 p.m. on Wednesday, March 23. I am waiting on a phone call for a job interview. I am truly a longshot, but hells bells, if they want to do a second interview, you got it. It'd be running Community Relations for the state of Alabama for BP/Gulf Coast Restoration Organization. I applied in January, when my future wasn't looking too bright. Now I need some shades.

My interview is with that one lady from the commercials. As a PR person, I'm humbled to be considered, but on the other hand, I'd love to take her aside and soak in her knowledge.

I've also spent the day with my Nanny learning more about her in-home care that is going to be needed. It has been a long-ass three weeks since she went into the hospital and then broke her ankle. Fortunately my mom is coming home tonight, so she can relieve me of my duties.

I've learned two things during this process. 1. I want to die at an old, healthy age. I know when God says, "You're done, pac…

Don't Judge Me

First off, please let me say two things:

Don’t judge me.
Everyone is fine.

Saturday was quite an interesting day; interesting in the fact that I did nothing, for once. However, with three weeks to the wedding and pale skin, I decided it was time to sign up for some tanning. Fake and Bake, here I am.

After spending time with Nanny, who had nothing to “allow” because she was too busy stuffing KFC into her face, I headed to the local franchise of a national tanning place. The Size 0 clerk assured me I’d be tan in no time. Hot diggidy!

After that I got home, put my purse on the floor and went about my Saturday night routine: drink, pajamas, couch. I heard some scuffling in the kitchen but had not enough energy to care. Awhile later, Poncho comes to me, pounces up on the couch and falls over, dead like. “Oh, sweet boy, just wants to love on his momma.” He wedges himself into this nook between me and the couch, his head perched on my lap. He stays like this a bit longer than usual. I get up, get…

Random Tidbits

What the What? I often find myself quoting 30 Rock. Unfortunately the listeners don’t always appreciate it and perhaps get offended when I say things like, “I love it so much I want to take it behind a middle school and get it pregnant.” We all know I steer clear of middle schools and can’t get anything pregnant. I love Tracy Morgan in this show. He's his own version of crazy.

Owned. I am owned by many things right now. Here is a brief list:
Casseroles - homemade
The Fresh Market's Rotisserie Chicken Salad
Cylindrical Meat (always)
Arrested Development
The Song "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele
The Song "Colder Weather" by Zac Brown Band
Zebra Print Shoes
My Favorite Bartender Vince My Fitness Partner Shawn
The parking guidelines at HealthSouth on Governor's Drive
Pink Taffeta dresses
Morning Running

The other day I came home and my GOD the dogs were excited to see me. I'd only been gone a few hours, but they really missed me. I was overjoyed at the…

It's Been A Long Time

Greetings. It's been awhile. Nearly three months since I last posted a blog.

It's been a rough week. I'm not sure where to start. Since Julie is the only reader and she already knows everything about me...I'll just pick up like no time has passed. Here are a few things that have happend these past few weeks.

The guy standing in front of the banana stand at the grocery store was lingering a little too long. I spotted him as I was making a bee-line for the bananas. His large body swayed. His head moved as he examined the offerings. I didn't have time for him. I waltzed up, picked a bunch and went on my way. Three minutes later as I was perusing the mixed nuts Mr. Banana comes up to me. "How did you do that? How did you pick your bananas so quickly?"

I wanted to say "I have seen a lot of banana shaped items, so I can pick 'em like a pro." I chuckled to myself as I held my tongue. "I've just got a good eye," I said wit…